Goodnight, love
by Twilight Angel
Summary: I think that works for a rating... Warning: Suicide... so does that mean I should rate it R? GRRRRRR!!! New author, don't know what I'm doing... GOMEN!


Title

**Title**: Goodnight, Love

**Author**: Twilight Angel

**Notes:** Don't ask where this came from. I don't even know. All I know is that it came.

**Warnings**: Suicide. Heero Torture (emotionally). um…… um….. not much else.

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Warmth… thick warmth trailing down my fingers. It feels so nice, so comforting to know that I am still human. The blood rolling off my fingers into the sink beneath me proves that. The beautiful deep red of blood still amazes me. It has such a wonderful color, really. I can't believe it's come to this. After all those damned self destructions I am forced to this… watching my own blood flow in rivers down my hands and splatter the pearly white porcelain with it's wondrous crimson. I suppose dying in one of those self detonated explosions would be too honorable for someone who's hands are as blood stained as mine. I laugh at the harsh actuality of that thought. My hands are stained with the blood of one more before I die, myself. But this blood feels cleansing. Blood spilt in repent for all the lives taken. This world has no use for me now. The war's over and soldiers are left with nothing to do but think. Thinking can be very dangerous. How do you think I ended up here? Just felt like it? No… I was thinking about… everything. I realized I'm utterly useless in this world of peace. A peace I fought to create and protect. A peace I knew I would never be able to enjoy. Hmm… This is going to slow. I'm thinking again. Shouldn't be doing that. I pick up the razor on the counter and cut another gash along my arm, just above the first. There… that should speed things up. Gotta be gone by the time Duo gets back. Oh Damn! I got blood on one of Quatre's towels… this shit is a bitch to get out. Sorry Quatre. It's surprising we all stayed together this long. I know I know. It's only been a few months but that's still a long time in the life of a soldier, especially a perfect one.Guess their little creation was too perfect. I mean I'm here aren't I? The war is over and here I am, standing in front of a sink in the bathroom of one of Quatre's dozens of estates. Not for long though. My legs are getting weak and I feel like I'm going to collapse. I'm glad Quatre and Trowa went out tonight. And Duo too, of course. Wherever he went I'm glad. If he was here I'd never get the chance to do this. Where did he go? Hmpf… probably told me but I was too busy drooling over him to realize. I remember hearing "seven" come out of those perfect lips though. That means I have about another half hour before he gets home. I wonder what he'll do? Make some kinda joke? 'Bout time I did it? Hmpf… probably. He hates me. I know it .I'm too quiet and boring for someone so beautiful and full of life. It's better this way. I'd eventually just bring him down. Then I'd feel guilty and I'd come to this end anyway. My legs finally give out as I lay across the floor, trying desperately to keep from staining the shaggy cream-colored rug beneath me. It's no use. The blood won't pool it has to slide across the tiles and absorb into the rug. Sorry Quatre. Looks like you'll be buying a new rug. Everything is swirling. There seem to be some pretty interesting colors that I don't remember seeing in the bathroom. It looks like mist has covered the room 'cause everything is fuzzy looking. I hear someone call to me. I look up but see nothing. Suddenly I'm staring into frightened violet-blue eyes. Oh… look… god sent me an angel after all.But why would an angel be frightened? Don't worry angel… Suddenly black covers my view and the angel returns. Bright eyes sparkling with tears. Why would an angel cry? Don't cry angel…the angel turns away and I feel a hard pressure on my wrist… No! Angel, don't stop it. Let me go to heaven with you. Please Angel, please! There is no longer the wonderful feeling of blood dripping down my hand but it's still flowing, I can tell that much. The same insistent weight is applied to my other wrist. No Angel! Don't you want me to go with you!? That's it… you don't want me… who would? Please! Please take me with you, Angel!Don't leave me here, all alone. Please! PLEASE! "please" The Angel looks at me quickly. I said it… I did! The Angel knows!!!! Yes you heard me! Please! The angel stares at me, tears streaming down his cheeks. He pulls me close. Then gently sets me down, running from the bathroom. ANGEL! Come back! Please! I know this is my angel but still something tells me, Angels aren't scared. Angels don't cry. Angels don't wear black. Angels don't run, they fly. Angels don't save your body, they save your soul. Suddenly it dons on me. It really is my angel. It's my Duo. An angel fallen from heaven not one come to take me away. Dear gods, I made Duo cry. I'm so sorry. I just want to leave. Now I feel worse then when I was thinking. I made Duo cry… Duo is leaning over me again, back as quickly as he left. Tears still pouring from his eyes as he cradles me against his chest. I'm sorry Duo… I wish you could hear me… I'll apologize later… I'm so tired right now… so very very tired. "Goodnight, love"

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Ok, hi!!!! This is sad… right? I thought it was and I wrote it! Anyway, this is what happens when I am sick and depressed and have spent the whole day watching the world spin. Give me feed back at Twilight_Angel301@hotmail.com If you like I might continue with Heero lives happy sappy mushy. or Heero dies . Duo gets depressed and more of the above depression. hmmm…. but considering I have 3 other stories in the works I doubt that'll happen for a while. But when I get stuck in my stories you can be sure to find plenty of these little things popping up. Many of which will probably be songfics, unlike this one. Hehe! Well, JA NE!


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